Monday, 9 January 2012

North Korean media mystified by mindless hysteria of Premier League hype

Scenes of mysterious hysteria, intensely controlled news management and inexplicably one sided contests have been met with derision after Premier League football was broadcast in North Korea for the first time.

“There were hordes of people crying over a result which was clearly 99% predictable,” wrote the Pyonyang Daily Spew."

It continued: “In this mysterious league where dissident journalists are immediately banned by Commandante Fergusonov, there appears to be genuine uncertainty over the result of Manchester United versus Wigan.

“This is quite odd as our friends in Malaysia always seem to know the score and make great sums of money from this knowledge.”

The Kin Jong-Un Daily Message was equally confused.

It said: “We see this great grief  by the strange fans of Wigan. Did they think their tribe of fat guys and young children could beat the great warriors of Manchester whose men are twice the size? Even the great Kim Jung-Un would not claim such a ridiculous thing and he claims he is cooler than Batman."



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